Today, I’m going to take you through everything you need to know about how to use bondage rope. As well as some video tutorials for how to tie bondage rope and shibari ties, I’ll also share my top tips for ways to tease your partner once you’ve got them tied up!
Many people start their bondage journey with a simple pair of handcuffs, and that taste often turns into a hunger for something more creative and exciting! Enter bondage rope.
I tested out the Kink Bind and Tie Initiation Kit and thought I’d share some basic bondage rope tying projects to help you start your bondage rope journey!
How to use bondage rope the quick and dirty guide:
- Familiarise yourself with the risks involved and how to minimize them by reading up on bondage rope safety.
- Practice your knots
- Move onto bondage with a partner
- Always practice aftercare.
Why use bondage rope?
While pre-made bondage restraints are a fantastic option, bondage rope has some qualities that just can’t be matched for many.
Firstly, you can be much more creative with your bondage, both in terms of its looks and functionality. Your imagination really is the limit (within the bounds of safety, of course), and there’s so much to learn that you can keep developing your rope skills.
You can use bondage rope for restraint and restriction, to decorate the body with Shibari ties, to provide stimulation and much more.
Bondage rope ties have a more raw, and organic quality, and the rope can hug the curves of your body so beautifully. Not to mention, the feel of rope and sex knots against your skin can create a delicious layer of sensation.
How to use bondage rope — some basic BDSM ties
Ok, now we are going to put that knot tying badge and macrame practice to work! You only need a few basic knots to get started, and you might already know these sex knots from other, less sexy, places!
I recommend spending some time practicing these bondage ties before you actually want to use them, both for safety reasons and it’s just not that sexy to be mumbling to yourself while trying to figure out if the rope goes under or over!
It’s also a good idea to practice your BDSM rope ties on a non-living object a few times to get a feel for the process.
A few things to know before you start…
- Be sure to read my rope safety guidelines before getting started with your bondage ties.
- Have your safety shears nearby at all times.
- Always make sure you can fit a couple of fingers between your partner’s body and the BDSM rope ties.
- When crossing the rope over or making knots, you want it to sit flat to the body so it doesn’t dig in and put pressure on one single spot. Make sure the rope isn’t twisted as you go.
- Your rope should be at least 5 mm in diameter so it doesn’t dig into the skin.
How to tie bondage rope in a single column tie
Single column ties, as the name suggests, are tied around a single column of the body — an arm, an ankle, or a leg, for example.
These bondage ties are great for restraining a limb to another object, like the bed or a chair, while you tease your partner! You can also use this BDSM tie on your partner’s wrists and ankles to restrain them to bed!
Step-by-step video instructions:
How to make a double column tie
Double column ties join two columns on the body together, such as the wrists, ankles, or a wrist and leg.
Double column BDSM ties are great for restricting movement by tying two body parts to each other or holding the body in certain positions.
You can use this bondage tie to tie your partner’s wrists or ankles to each other or even a wrist to a thigh or ankle.
Step-by-step video instructions:
How to use bondage rope — some more advanced options
Once you learn a few basic bondage rope ties, you can make some pretty amazing looking bondage harnesses that only actually require basic bondage rope tying skills. They also open up more opportunities for different kinds of restraint play!
You can even combine the chest and crotch rope restraints for some more intense bondage!
Basic chest harness
This basic chest harness is simple to make but looks fantastic and opens up a lot of play possibilities!
You will need a longer piece of bondage rope for this tie, but how much you need will depend on the size of the person being tied up. For reference, the piece I use in the video was 50 ft long, but I had a lot left over.
Chest harness video instructions part 1:
Part 2:
Part 3:
Crotch rope and split crotch rope
This simple rope thong is only uses very basic shibari ties and provides some teasing stimulation. Plus, it can be adapted to suit all genitals!
In the video, I tie a crotch rope with a happy knot, which can be used to stimulate the wearer’s clitoris. You will need to figure out where to tie the knot to get it in the right place and will probably need to adjust slightly, so I recommend leaving the knot a little loose until you’ve found just the right spot!
You can also split the two ropes to pass around a penis or outside of the labia.
As your ropes will come into contact with genitals and bodily fluids, be sure to clean your ropes after, and have a dedicated rope for each person.
Crotch rope video instructions part 1:
Part 2:
You’ve tied your partner up, now what?
Ok, let’s rewind just a second. Before you tie your partner up, you should discuss what activities you want to explore while restrained — this is an important part of negotiating the scene. Here are some ideas of what you could try:
Sensation play
When we tease the sensory system with different types of sensations, it creates a state of high sensory alert, amplifying each delicious touch on our body.
Some of the top sex toys for sensation play are pinwheels, bondage ticklers, nipple clamps, floggers, silk scarves, or even your mouth and hands to create different sensations on the body.
Impact play
Impact play can range in intensity from sweet taps to get a little more blood flowing to more intense whips and thwacks, depending on what the receiving partner desires. Floggers, spanking paddles, or crops are all great for creating a range of intensities and sensations.
Not only is impact play psychologically thrilling, but it also increases blood flood to the area, making it more sensitive to other types of touch, so following it up with some kisses or licks can feel intensely pleasurable!
Always start gently and on the fleshy areas of the body. You can alternate between hits and strokes to create some balance. If you are exploring impact play on sensitive areas like the nipples or genitals, you should take a more gentle approach.
Spanking paddles are great for use on the more fleshy areas, such as the butt. Generally, the more surface area the paddle has, the more thuddy it will feel. Smaller, thinner paddles will feel more stingy.
Whips and BDSM Floggers are great for creating a range of sensations. As well as flogging your partner, you can sensually stroke the falls over their body or create a tickling sensation.
BDSM Crops are very stingy due to their small surface area, so use them cautiously. They can be a good option for lighter tapping around the inner thighs, vulva, and nipples.
Temperature play
Another subcategory of sensation play, temperature play toys with our body’s sense of hot and cold.
Massage candles and BDSM candles are great for dripping warm wax onto your partner’s body or you can heat or cool stainless steel or borosilicate glass sex toys in warm or cold water before use.
Ice cubes (partially melted) are great for trailing over your partner’s sensitive spots. You can also use an ice cube during oral sex to a pleasurable mix of hot and cold.
Orgasm play
Playing with someone’s ability to orgasm can be thrilling, frustrating, and intensely stimulating. You can choose between controlling your partner’s orgasm or making them climax again and again until they can’t take anymore!
Edging or orgasm control/denial
Orgasm control or orgasm denial can be an intoxicating form of power play. Controlling your partner’s orgasm by building them up to the edge of an orgasm without letting them tip over the edge will have them desperate for the release of a climax. It can also make the feeling so much more intense when you finally let them have it!
Forced orgasms
Consensual forced orgasms push your body to the limits of pleasure by seeing just how many times you can orgasm before enough is enough. This type of play tends to work better on vulva owners as it is easier for them to have multiple orgasms.
Magic wand vibrators and sex machines are great for this type of play as they make it easy to provide continuous, extended stimulation.
Bondage rope safety
Before anyone gets tied up, or down, there are a few simple but super important safety guidelines to protect both partners’ emotional and physical safety.
As with any BDSM activity, there’s some level of risk involved in using bondage rope. The best way to minimize this risk is to educate yourselves beforehand! The kink community uses the acronyms RACK and PRICK to highlight the importance of taking responsibility for the risks involved.
Plus, working through these steps together also helps to build trust and confidence, which makes for a much more pleasurable bondage experience and builds intimacy in the long run!
Bondage rope safety guidelines
- Make sure that you have full consent. That means that the consent must be Freely given, Reversible at any time, Informed, Enthusiastic, and Specific to each activity (FRIES).
- Discuss your boundaries and what you want to get out of the experience. You can discuss what activities/types of stimulation you want to explore while tied up and if any body parts or activities are off-limits and what type of language you are comfortable using during the scene.
- Ask about any pre-existing medical issues or injuries that could impact your session and have any necessary medications nearby.
- Choose a safe word or signaling system, like the traffic light system. Anytime you feel safe or uncomfortable, you can use the safeword to stop play immediately.
- Keep some safety shears nearby in case you need to cut the rope off in an emergency.
- Only use bondage rope when you are sober. Drugs and alcohol alter your reaction times, ability to feel pain, and risk perception. You might also be more inclined to do things you wouldn’t agree to sober.
- Never leave someone tied up alone in case of an emergency.
- Always leave a gap of a two fingers between the rope and your partner’s body to minimize the risk of cutting off their circulation or causing nerve compression or damage.
- Never move someone with their ankles or hands tied, as this increases the risk of injury from falling.
- Watch out for any signs of circulatory or nerve damage, such as numbness, tingling, pins and needles, changes in color, or pain, and remove the ropes immediately if any arise.
- Don’t play when you are unwell, and eat and drink something before playing to reduce the risk of fainting.
- Always end with aftercare.
Consider signing up for a Shibari tutorial
If you are keen to delve further into Shibari, I highly recommend signing up for an in-person or online Shibari tutorial. Beducated has an amazing Shibari tutorial that covers everything you need to know to get started with this amazing art form!
Plus, you can save a massive 33% on a lifetime pass, giving you access to their whole, ever expanding, library for life!
Bondage rope aftercare ideas
- Gently undo all of the bondage rope ties, being careful not to drag it across the skin and leave a rope burn
- Check the skin for any marks or damage, and apply moisturizer or ointment if you wish to.
- Have something to eat and drink.
- Offer a warm blanket or some cuddles.
- Spend some time reflecting on your experiences. You can ask questions such as, what feelings came up for you, what did you enjoy or not enjoy, was there anything that triggered you, would you like to try this again, and if so, what would you do differently? What BDSM tying skills would you like to practice more? This discussion can be ongoing, as you might have more thoughts as you process the experience.
